Wednesday, August 11, 2010


How does one decide what to believe? Everyone with an opinion has a valid point. Is there a way to combine everyones opinion and find what The Real Truth is?

I'm going to try and tackle this issue in my own way.

First let me say that anytime I have brought this up in conversation, even if it was just to ask a woman how she feels about the subject, I get the same response: Extreme anger and the opinion that because I'm a man, I don't have the right to an opinion because I couldn't possibly understand the idea or the situation.

Ok, I'm fine with that. I am aware that I could never understand how a woman might feel about this. I can, however, understand how a human could feel about it.

Specific things that women go through I could not begin to understand, of that much I'm sure. Still, I am an intelligent, caring, empathic person who really wants to know the truth about every situation, not just my own.

In my years past, I was pro-life. The more horror stories I heard, the more I started having feelings of empathy for the raped, the medically incapable and the ignorant.

I never did find the middle ground that tells me exactly what is the truth is on this topic. I think that anyone who truly tries to find the real truth will might feel the same.

On the one hand you value life as being the most precious thing we have. On the other, the injustice of some asshole doing something so dastardly as rape. Many times the mother ends up hating the child and couldn't possibly raise it and can't see them self carrying it for 9 months and having to think about the rape every day for almost a year. Then ending up with an adoption instead of the love of a child. Then there's the science of it. Regardless of what Christians, Dems or Catholics believe, there is another side to this.

All I can do is give my own experiences along with some information that may help you to decide this issue yourself. I will not present my own opinions as to the morality of it, because I am still deciding myself and I may never know how to feel on the issue truly.

Catholics and Christians alike believe that the soul enters the body at conception. That part of the equation is not yet provable by science or any other rationality, including the religious one. There is no religion that can say when conception actually occurs because there's no reference to it in religious texts. (at least not that I am aware of.)

That doesn't mean that it doesn't, just that there's no documentation I can find for them to think that it does. Their argument depends somewhat on that premise. The courts decided after looking at the available science that about three months was when the fetus was formed enough to have a nervous system and could feel pain and after that, it would be a person. At least that's the way I remember the situation. If there are any out there with facts disputing any of this, please let me know. It's my opinion that the courts tried to be kind and still stay within scientific guidelines about this.

So it's not murder if it has a soul. Taking the chance on murder depending on when the soul enters the body is the main topic I guess. So the safe bet is to assume as soon as the sperm finds its way into the egg, God sends down a soul. Their argument is a pretty good one, I must say.

To continue with the Christian argument, the majority of women who have abortions experience between some remorse, and extreme remorse. I would imagine that would depend on their moral views on the subject, but that isn't very clear in statistics. Just an supposition. I can imagine the regret of never knowing your child, the guilt of not truly knowing if what you did was wrong, or the  belief that you know it's wrong. The destruction to your internal organs, maybe never being able to have a child in the future because of the procedure.

There is one aspect that I can't avoid when discussing this topic. The morality of killing anyone. Not just killing a fetus, but capital punishment or in war or even in defense of family. If you can kill to protect your home and belongings with lethal force, why can't you kill for emotional reasons? Some women get off the hook when killing their husbands when they are PMS'ing. In some states it's legal to kill an intruder. There are some laws still on the books that allow duals.

What we can get from this is that the law and what is moral are two separate things entirely. The law tends to be what is good for a society, but not necessarily what is considered moral. Every state has different laws concerning what is acceptable or not acceptable.

We know how Christians believe, we know how the girl who was raped feels. What does science say and how can it bridge the gap between the two? And how do we decide when the child will be born with a terrible and painful disease and maybe not live very long, but the birth would put the mother at risk?

We know how the husband might decide, but what would the mother want? Doesn't the husband have any say in the matter of his own offspring? Many women feel he doesn't. The reality is that while it's her body that carries they child, it is his child too and his seed. He does have legal rights in the decision in most states.

From a mere science standpoint, as well as simply human, one would argue that as long as the development of the nervous system hasn't developed to the point where the fetus would feel any pain if aborted, it would be acceptable and not cruel to a living form of life.

Science should really not have a moral objection at any point at all except that scientists are still humans and it's that humanity that keeps them from being moral monsters, with feeling for what other go through or feel.

You can never put yourself in the place of a woman raped. There is nothing that can top the torture and the feeling of being slaved and demoralized. Physical torture in other fashions don't compare. The loss of self and self esteem, the guilt and the fear. There's very little on this earth I can think of worse than rape. To be reminded of it for 20+ years after trying to raise the child of a rapist can never be ok to have to live with.
The only thing worse than raping a woman would be the rape or destruction of a child's innocence. Maybe.

So you bomb clinics that offer abortions. You kill to make your point that its not ok to kill. You say its murder and make a raped woman feel even worse after all she's already had to live through. Shame on you. You are just as bad as the original rapist.

Not all abortions are a consequence of rape. Probably most aren't. (Don't tag me on statistics, it's not the point here). Mother's who disallow their children the benefit of sex education in our schools, but never educate their own children on the topic are just as much to blame as the young woman is at being careless. The one instance where I do not believe abortions should be allowed to take place is just for the stupidity and carelessness of the person who got pregnant. Now days, girls are getting pregnant just because they want to.

I heard of a woman (child) getting pregnant because she had a friend who told her she could lose weight this way. The friend didn't happen to mention that this was because of postpartum depression. Now she has to live with the decision and frankly, I wish she would have been sterilized instead of being allowed to add to the gene pool. Do I agree with abortions under these types of circumstances? I still don't know. I would hate to think this teenager would be raising a child. I cringe at the thought of what the child would have to go through just to end up another gang shot dead child or end up with life in prison, never having experienced any of the wonders life can be or bring.

Then again, what the hell did the child ever do to deserve such an ass for a mother? Might it live a full, meaningful life? Not likely but that's not my decision to make and neither should it be the courts nor the churches until one side can prove completely that they are right. It's an individual issue. Make up your own mind and don't let anyone sway you until you have all the facts you feel you need to make an informed, logical and moral decision.

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